shrimp and lobster

Thursday, November 03, 2005

sex, phonography and scandal

I am a young Pinay and have access to the latest technology out there in the market, I am aware of the latest La Salle sex scandal, which featured two couples from the said University having sex in a hote caught on tape. My long term boyfriend and I also have our own share of phonography, we both solemnly sweared to protect each and everyone of them PERIOD.

FREAK OF NATURE: last night I browsed thru friendster and came across boy bastos where manyaks thrive, I was taken aback by a picture that seemed very much familiar, although it didnt have a clear face, I swear that I recognize my own body, I just had to open the link, and to my further amazement, I recognize my boyfriend's hand, I saw 4 different pictures and they all look like me and my boyfriend. Obviously, I freaked out...

I confronted my boyfriend about, denied the allegations, accused me of being crazy and got totally mad that I was capable of thinking of him as such person.

His points are as follows:
1. What could he get out from it, if ever he did it?
2. There are numerous Pinoys and Pinays with that exactly the same private parts.
3. The face cannot be identified
4. He had never even seen or heard of the site.
5. He doesnt even have a cable connector for his video cam.

My points are:
1. I know my own body and his (he argued it didnt look like his daw, and I should be abashed by saying that)
2. I recognize some of the girls pictures in his brother's collection of said girlfriends (he asked me how could I think like that, it was so sick in my part he said)
3. I saw pictures like those taken ( he said I erased them already)
4. Maybe they were the pictures taken on his phone.
5. and I have scar in my hand, which I dont think is too freaky to have anyone have it exactly the same way (he said it didnt look like it)
6. I witnessed this 'deny to death attitude ' from him while he was apparently dating this t.v game survivor turned actress. (then he calls me crazy, and blames me of not having an attitude of getting over things easily)

Maybe I was crazy, I could take his word for it, but deep in my head I feel that I just know. I dont want to be wrong about this, I dont want to believe that he's such, I love him but lately I'm noticing that he's not good for me anymore.

I was hurt because

1. Lately, He has total disregard of my feelings ( he said he'd rather sleep on it than try to make me feel better about it)
2. He said I should consult a head doctor and that something is really wrong with me.
3. He said that why cant I be like him, and let go easily. (There was also an incident in Davao, which was just 5 days ago, which really had an impact on me, it involved his manager, imagine that person yelling at me at the airport, screaming and making me spend more by making me get another hotel far from them)

He added that it's only me who could make myself happy, which is true, alot of things are going thru my mind, maybe I should gather up the courage to leave this relationship, afterall it is only I who could do anything about my happiness right?



2 Comments:

  • At 8:07 PM, Blogger Tatiana said…

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  • At 6:44 AM, Blogger pinaybloodrush said…

    Hi Kim...

    This is jen (well aka pinaybloodrush) thank you for commenting on some of my posts...thank you for taking time and reading it...

    I just want you to bite on this "find the person who will love you because of your differences and not in spite of them". This was something I have learned.

    Hope this will not be the last time that we’d be sending each other messages, feel free to deconstruct my posts.

    God Bless.

     

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